just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
