Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
should my penis look like a turkey
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
