Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
