Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
