If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Randomize
