You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
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