Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize