I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Randomize