break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize