Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
