Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(480): View more from Arizona

You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone

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(440): View more from Ohio

We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!

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(207): View more from Maine

Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........

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(406): View more from Montana

I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.

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(903): View more from Texas

I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone

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(972): View more from Texas

Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.

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(606): View more from Kentucky

This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.

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(276): View more from Virginia

Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?

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(630): View more from Illinois

you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.

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