I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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