garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize