I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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