Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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