i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I had to cum in my sink.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
