Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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