My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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