i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
