the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
