man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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