Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(858): View more from California

i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth

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(563): View more from Iowa

I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death

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(208): View more from Idaho

She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"

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(773): View more from Illinois

If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

zippers are such a cool invention

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(312): View more from Illinois

it's gonna be a chat room kind of night

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(231): View more from Michigan

Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.

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(415): View more from California

Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends

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(250): View more from British Columbia

After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash

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