There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize