I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Your cock deserves a montage
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
