i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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