My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
