Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Randomize
