I cockslap morals
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
