Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize