Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
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