guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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