He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
You did what with his pubic hair?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
