Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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