dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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