yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Sorry my hands just texted you
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Brb crying the tears of my youth
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
