i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
