mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize
