yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Someone shit on the floor
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize