What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Dick very happy bro
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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