I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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