I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
you told grandpa to call you daddy
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
