How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
