Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
