Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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