I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
