The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Randomize
