it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
