you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Randomize
