Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
