If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
and she was petting her beer can
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
